Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Something fishy going on...

It occurred to me that the arrival of a new goldfish in the house had gone unmentioned. So let me say this: Guildenstern is alive.

Considering the murder of Guildenstern by Rosencrantz, I was dubious about introducing another victim/offering/fish into the tank. I consulted the Pet Shop Lady, who good-naturedly suggested that the fish's rapid decline might have been down to the water or food... eventually she concluded that since Rosencrantz had been unaffected, she was a murderer; no denying it.

"So then I shouldn't get another one?"
She pondered: "Well, if you've got an aggressive fish like Rosie, I reckon you should get..."
"...a teeny tiny fish?"
"...the biggest fish we have."

I see. The tactic was to take the fight to Rosie.

So, a relatively mammoth Guildenstern II was bought. It wasn't the easiest of settling-in periods. Both fish sank to the bottom, immobile unless they were braining themselves against the tank (which has whole Tamburlaine-Zenocrate resonances...) - so I separated them into bowls, where they seemed happy...

...until Guildy flung himself out of the bowl onto the floor.

By the time I found him, he'd gone past the flapping and panting stage. He was quiet and still. I scooped him up, and he flumped to the bottom of the tank, processing the trauma. Meanwhile Rosie was all happy in her bowl, making no attempts to shuffle off any coils at all.

And then, some hours later, while I explained about quarantine and restful solitary environments, my brother offered some expert advice. "Just chuck 'em in together. If they're gonna die they're gonna die."

It was with some trepidation that I peered into the kitchen the following morning. Two fish. And not just alive, but swimming, hanging out, co-habiting.

I haven't really been able to find any moral in all this.

Anyhoo, on the subject of fishies, I've memorized my first few swimming drills for the oh-so-relaxing Total Immersion method. Off I go for a little swim&sauna :-)

4 comments:

TomRourke said...

Well....I may not see a moral, but I cetainly see a lesson: Never, ever, leave your Brother in charge of teaching small children to swim! I was thinking about an alternative narrative to G2's first days in Orlaithland.....two fish sitting very still at the bottom of the tank, fishywhispering "maybe if we're very very quiet and still, the great creature will stop staring at us and maybe will not eat us".......until one of them fisheyscreams "I just can't take it , i can't , the tension.....I have to ....have to .....escape"...just saying....its plausible....

Orlaith said...

Ha ha!! Okay first: my Brother is a fabulous, patient, teacher-of-swimming. I expect he saw this as a Fear of the Other issue - where we erroneously exoticise or demonise the Unknown. By placing the fishies in close proximity, both come to realise their common fishey-hood, and from there they came to recognise and perhaps even celebrate their shared nature (in a Jungian Collective Unconscious kinda way).

I'm just saying, he's a great teacher.

Two: having made that clear, the idea of fishywhispering is genius :-)

Grainne said...

The only thing I have to add is that some people(!) have too much time to think..

Orlaith said...

Fair point :-)